How to Find Your Worth in Your Self and Not in Others
Many people struggle daily to build and maintain a positive self-esteem. Some struggle more than others because they have not yet developed a true sense of self. It is impossible to have self-esteem without a sense of self. How can you feel good about yourself if you don’t really even know who you are? When developing your sense of self, one of the key factors is to find your self-worth in yourself and not in others. Most of us are guiltier of this than we would like to admit. For example, if a girl is dating a guy who is verbally and emotionally abusive and tells her things like she is fat, worthless and disgusting, then she tends to believe this about her self and lose her sense of worth. She adapts his belief of her, which in turn affects her self-esteem.
So, how do you find your self worth in yourself rather than others?
1. Set boundaries: Before getting into any relationship or friendship, be very aware of the kind of people you want to let into your life. You do not deserve to be belittled; therefore, you need to make that your own belief, so that it is easy to stick to your boundary. Start vague like: “I will not allow people that do not value me into my intimate life.” And become more specific as you become more confident in your ability to set and stick to boundaries.
2. Embrace your qualities and your flaws. No one is perfect. Everyone has flaws. The sooner you realize that it’s okay to not be okay, the quicker you will learn to love yourself. If you have set impossible standards for yourself, take some time to break those standards down and rebuild realistic ones.
3. Stop comparing yourself to others. Whether it’s your siblings, your friends, your spouse’s ex, or a celebrity, comparing yourself to others does NO GOOD for you or your self worth. You are the only you and that is amazing. Start believing in yourself and you’ll stop comparing yourself to others, and start celebrating each person’s unique self.
4. Seek out counseling. If you are finding it hard to get started on building your sense of self, self-esteem and self-worth, then seek out a professional counselor that can help guide you through this process and help you discover YOU! You deserve happiness! Don’t put it off any longer.
If you are wondering where to begin to start the counseling process, then call Life Counseling Solutions at 407-622-1770 for a FREE consultation!