Beat the Holiday Stress for Blended Families & Time Sharing
The holidays can be a stressful time for blended families. Whether your family has gone through a recent divorce/separation, or not, it’s easy to become overwhelmed with stress and anxiety about the holidays and making it all work. Here are 5 ways to beat the holiday stress for blended families and time sharing.
Be open and honest in discussing upcoming holiday events and time sharing. Discuss the time share schedule, drop off and pick up times and locations. Set a doable budget for holiday spending and who will be doing the actual shopping.
Accept what you can’t change
In most cases, one parent may not be able to spend time with the children, due to the time-sharing schedule which can be hard. Be realistic that this is not the ex-spouses fault. If possible make plans to call, face time or email the children on the given holiday. Accept that this is not the end of the world you will see the children during your scheduled time.
Avoid Acting Out
Remain focused on the well-being of your children for the holidays. Do all that you can to avoid arguing or saying negative comments about the other parent. You know what conversations could trigger you to act out therefore avoid those traps at all cost.
If gift giving is a family tradition, be sure that all the children receive gifts, those living there full time and part time. There should also not be a major difference in the gifts that the children receive. Splitting the cost of gift buying could give child a false send of their parents reuniting, so it’s a good idea to purchase gift separately. Encourage the children to have a gift for their step-parent as well, whether it’s something small and homemade, or purchased with their own money. Step parents can become very stressed due to the step children not acknowledging them for holiday gift exchange. The step parent should not take this personal, and know that it may be just as uncomfortable for the children as it is for you. Lastly, don’t make it a competition with anyone on who is giving the most expensive gift. Remember that spending time with family has a longer lasting effect on the family, than the most expensive gift.
Take Care of Yourselves
Remember to slow down, and breathe. The holidays come and go so quickly, it’s easy to get caught up and forget to stop. Make time for each other this holiday season, exchange gifts, go to holiday parties together and enjoy the season. Love on each other intentionally.
Remember, you and your spouse are on the same team. You both want to see the family grow and have safe and healthy relationships. If you find that you are having a difficult time keeping the peace in your home due to the issues that arise in blended families, call Life Counseling Solutions at 407-622-1770 to schedule a complimentary phone consult, or to schedule your first appointment.
Cherlette is a realistic and compassionate person who believes that counseling should be tailored to the needs of the client. Her goal is to help you explore the negative beliefs that are keeping you stuck and are no longer beneficial. Cherlette will help you replace them with positive beliefs that will help you move towards growth and your desired change. Read more about her here…