By: Mike Martinez

It’s important to take a moment and listen to the things we tell ourselves. Listen to them not in the aspect of agreement, but in analyzation: is what I’m telling myself the truth? Should I be telling myself these things? It’s true that we often say things to ourselves we wouldn’t even tell our worst enemies. Isn’t it time we change our self-talk?

The following steps can help with changing our self-talk so that we can be ultimately happier.

Step #1: Listen.

Listen to the things we tell ourselves most often: “I’m a mess,” or “I just can’t (insert what you THINK you can’t do here).” If we can become aware of how often we tell ourselves these things we can begin to make the changes to become kinder to ourselves. Listening will build the awareness which is the first step toward change.

Step #2: Argue.

Argue against the self-talk! Remember times that you clearly were not those things that you tell yourself so often. Think of the things you have done when you were the exact opposite of those things you tell yourself. Then you’ll see that what you’ve been telling yourself really isn’t true after all.

Step #3: Replace.

Replace those negative things we tell ourselves with the opposite. “I’m organized,” “I’m always on time,” “I can (insert what you CAN do here).” As we practice saying these things to ourselves instead of our old, negative sayings, we can begin to see them come to light. Now, this takes time and practice. It will be very difficult at first because of the habits we’ve made, but in time these sayings will replace the old ones.

Step #4: Repeat.

If those old habits (old behaviors and negative self-talk) creep back repeat the process. Listen to them so you’re aware of them coming back, argue against them, and replace them again!

As we change our self-talk we can begin to become the new self-talk which will lead to us being more calm, self-confident, and happy. Isn’t it time you were a little nicer to yourself? Well you should be. You deserve it!

If you are struggling with negative thoughts that are constantly weighing you down, then call Life Counseling Solutions today! It is possibly to break free from the harmful cycle with help from our expert therapist. Book your first appointment with Mike by clicking here or calling us at 407-622-1770.

Michael_croppedMike’s goal is to assist clients in reaching their full potential by helping them explore within themselves to find their strengths. He pays special attention to building a therapeutic relationship through his laid back personality and humor in order to create a safe place for change and growth. Mike provides counseling services to people of many different backgrounds but specializes in helping first-time parents transition and those struggling with anger management. Click here more information on Mike.