Where technology, Facebook and connecting online can all be good things, they also have the potential to create a false sense of security and cause us to lose our real sense of intimacy. Think about some of the things that you post on Facebook and then consider if you would say those in person? This is not to say that Facebook is a bad thing at all, just keep in mind how much of what we say can really impact our relationships and try not to lose the personal touch of face-to-face interactions and communication.
Here are five important rules to consider carefully when you are dating and interacting on Facebook:
1- Relationship Status – Relationship status is a mutual decision. You can create lots of problems when you make a unilateral status change. Unless you have some kind of commitment and/or have been dating for a while, discuss it in person first before changing your status.
2- Do not tag the person you’re dating in photos – If he or she wants to be tagged in your pictures, let them tag themselves. After all, they may not want everyone on their friend list to know they hung out with you at the beach all weekend.
3- Do not Facebook your dating partner’s ex – this will not help you keep tabs on him/her or to find out if he/she is really over the ex. This will only create awkwardness and potential problems.
4- Watch what you say in your status updates – It’s better to keep things between the two of you especially in the early stages of dating, so try not to gush about him or her or complain about them in status updates. Remember he or she will see everything that you post, so keep your cards close to your chest.
5- Other People’s Comments Will Make You Jealous – Facebook brings us too close to people too quickly. Dating is as much about maintaining healthy and safe boundaries as it is about intimacy — at least at first — and social networking makes that harder than ever.
Just like when we say something and we wish we could take it back, once it is posted on Facebook, everyone can see it, not just the person you intended it for! Be respectful of your partner and work to never post anything that could be taken as being critical or embarrassing. So use technology, Facebook and other online applications to communicate, share and stay in touch, just don’t miss out on that deeper connection that can only come from talking with each other, seeing each other and spending time together.
About the Author: Relationship Expert, Janie Lacy, LMHC, NCC offers expert advice to Local and National TV News, Relationship Websites and provides phone or face-to-face counseling in the Orlando area. Janie has a relational approach and a unique ability to connect with individuals. Drawing upon her broad range of experience in private practice, not-for-profit organizations, hospitality and the medical industry, she has helped countless people in many arenas of life. She offers keen insight on all aspects of relationships – family, marriage, parenting, dating, and personal growth. Connect with Janie on Facebook or Twitter.
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