There is a movie about the musician Bob Dylan called “I’m Not There” (2007). This movie was unique because it depicts 6 different actors all coming together to play the different facets of one man. And although this was an experimental and “non-traditional” style of a biographical story, it is closer to the actual reality of who we are and how we express ourselves in life.
Have you ever had an argument with yourself when one side of you wants to do one thing and another part of you wants to do something else? Have you ever said something while you’re angry that, after that anger passes, you wonder, “Where did that come from?” Have you ever noticed that you take on certain traits when at work, then totally different traits around your friends and family? How about experiencing mixed feelings when it comes to a person or situation, such as feeling excitement and guilt or grief and relief.
These are all examples of your selves at work. Some of you may be asking, “What do you mean by selves? Isn’t having multiple personalities something only crazy people experience?” The answer is no and no. Everyone has multiple selves, different parts of us that come out to meet the needs or expectations of a given situation. It’s actually a pretty handy survival tool we developed to deal with and adapt to the different environments and events that present themselves.
These are times when we have to switch to a different “mode” of ourselves in order to complete a task to the best of our ability or to cope with something difficult. Many of us have experienced times when we are able to tune into a part of ourselves when we are with a particular person or in a particular place. How many times have you thought to yourself, “Wow, I really like who I am with this person,” or “I really hate who I am with this person”? Some people use this knowledge to their advantage, for example, calling or hanging out with a particular friend when they want to tune into the part of them that is more creative or funny.
Yet, despite the experience of having multiple selves being so normal, why is the myth about us having just one single self so prevalent?
Yet, despite the experience of having multiple selves being so normal, why is the myth about us having just one single self so prevalent? The truth is, this idea of a single self is fairly recent. Many cultures have long understood the self as being a collaboration of parts. In modern times, most people have gotten so used to this dynamic in their everyday life that they don’t even think about it; it naturally just happens on its own with any conscious noticing. It’s not until one pays attention to our inner worlds that these parts become apparent.
However, the myth of a single self causes considerable suffering. We can end up suppressing and denying parts of ourselves we see as a contradiction, and what we suppress manifests in unhealthy ways in our lives. For example, say you have a suppressed angry part that shows up in passive-aggressive behavior, sudden outbursts, or even headaches or heart issues. A suppressed sexual part can manifest in perfectionism/being hypercritical, emotional numbness, or feeling disembodied. We can also feel a lot of shame and uncertainty in our lives when we believe we’re supposed to have one fixed self and every shift in mood, desire, or identity feels like a betrayal of who we feel we’re supposed to be.
Today, fields such as psychology, consciousness studies, and neuroscience are beginning to rediscover the truth of our natural multiplicity. Many therapeutic approaches, often referred to as parts work modalities, reflect this understanding, including Internal Family Systems, Voice
Dialogue, Gestalt Therapy, Ego State Therapy, and the Jungian or Archetypal perspective, just to name a few.
Unlike therapy models that view the self as a single, unified whole, parts work recognizes that you are made up of many selves; each with its own perspective, emotions, and role, all trying to help in its own way. Instead of asking, “How do I stop feeling anxious?” we begin to ask, “What is this anxious part trying to tell me?” By listening to the message beneath the feeling, we can address the deeper roots of the anxiety, allowing it to soften and transform naturally.
As a therapist, I use different parts work techniques to help people build a more compassionate and balanced relationship with all the parts of who they are. Together, we explore the different voices, feelings, and stories that live within you, uncovering the truth and wisdom each one holds. Through conversation, creative expression, and body-based awareness, I support you in transforming inner conflict into connection and collaboration.
If you would like to know more or book a session with me, please email me at: Robert@lifecounselingsolutions.com
About Robert Jenkins, MS, RMHCI
Helping Artists, Creatives, and Spiritual Seekers Turn Emotional Depth into Strength
With a Master’s in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Antioch University and a professional background in film and theater, Robert merges clinical expertise with personal experience to support highly sensitive, expressive, and spiritually curious individuals. His approach blends evidence-based techniques with creative exploration and spiritual insight—honoring your full self: mind, body, and soul. Whether you’re an artist in burnout, a spiritually attuned professional navigating a life transition, or someone trying to reclaim their identity, Robert offers a safe, inclusive space to explore it all.
