Congratulations! You’ve just got home from the hospital with your wife and your new baby. There’s a lot of thought about how this new baby will affect your lives together and how you’re going to care for baby. But you know what? You actually have to take care of the New Mom too! Taking care of Mom will also help your relationship with her.
Here are four ways that you can take good care of Mom.
1. Diapers diapers diapers.
Change the diapers. Change as many diapers as you can. It doesn’t matter how sleepy you are, what time it is, or what you happen to be doing at the moment: just change that diaper. Volunteer/offer to change diapers frequently. This will work wonders for Mom’s mood, you’ll see.
2. Take initiative Don’t wait for Mom to tell you what to do.
If there’s a tower of dishes in the sink DO THEM! If the garbage needs to be taken out, DO IT! The less time Mom has to spend telling you what to do the better. Also, this will give Mom time to relax (if at all possible) or at least tend to baby’s needs without having to worry about pending chores. Remember, worry leads to stress and there will be plenty of stress during this adjustment anyway. So don’t add to it!
3. Troubleshoot when taking care of baby.
It’s safe to say when baby is crying it can be one of four things: dirty diaper, sleepy, hungry, or gassy. Troubleshoot the problem, don’t just give baby to Mom to troubleshoot. Check that diaper; if clean then find out when baby ate last. Is it time for another feeding? If so, prep the baby (change diaper) and make sure Mom is ready and has some water to drink. If baby ate recently, burp that baby! Uncomfortable gas can cause baby to cry.
Finally, if all needs have been met, baby may simply be sleepy. Rock that baby and do other techniques to get that baby to sleep (the 5 S’s always worked for my little one, google it). Of course, you should talk to your pediatrician if baby cries excessively and it does not seem to be any of the above problems.
4. Check in with her and be there for her.
Assess how she’s feeling and ask her what her needs are. Listen to her. Bring her food, water, and anything else she may need. Maybe she doesn’t want visitors that particular day. It’s your job to be the guard – make sure she doesn’t get visitors if she doesn’t want visitors. Doesn’t matter who it is. Turn them away if you have to. You are looking out for Mom and baby’s well-being so what she says goes.
Remember, before the little one came about it was just you and her so make sure you take care of that relationship. Practicing these 4 simple ways daily will help you and Mom to adjust to this exciting new change. It will also make you a better person for your new family.
Still struggling in your fatherly role and want some additional support or direction? Call today to set up an appointment with our parenting coach and expert Mike Martinez! You can call us at 407-622-1770 to set up a complimentary 15-minute phone consultation or appointment. Or click here to book your first appointment here online!
Mike’s goal is to assist clients in reaching their full potential by helping them explore within themselves to find their strengths. He pays special attention to building a therapeutic relationship in order to create a safe place for change and growth. Mike provides counseling services to people of many different backgrounds but specializes in helping first-time parents transition and those struggling with anger management. Click here to visit Mike’s full bio.