Janie Lacy

5 Reasons Adult Websites Can Ruin Your Relationship

There are many dangers to viewing adult websites; it can damage your most important relationship. In the highly publicized divorce case between Christy Brinkley and her now ex-husband Peter Cook, it was revealed that he spent thousands of dollars on adult websites among his extra-marital expenses. In the new movie, “Fire Proof”, the main actor struggles with adult websites. David Duchovny, X-Files TV show main actor, recently admitted to checking himself into an in-patient treatment facility for sexual addictions. The Internet has enabled more people to access pornography in the privacy of their home. Along with that fact, is the realization that it is destroying more committed relationships than ever.
1) IT WILL LOWER YOUR COMMITMENT TO YOUR RELATIONSHIP.
In the book, Back From Betrayal, author Jennifer P. Schneider, M.D., asserts that for some dissatisfied people, fantasizing about affairs is the first step to a real affair. She suggests that the fantasizing process occupies such a large part of a person’s inner world that little energy is left for the marital relationship.
2) IT WILL LOWER YOUR INTEREST IN YOUR SPOUSE.
Repeated exposure to adult websites results in a decreased satisfaction with one’s sexual partner, a decrease in the valuation of faithfulness and a major increase in the importance of sex without attachment.
3) IT PROVOKES POWERFUL EMOTIONS TO SOMEONE OTHER THAN YOUR SPOUSE.

Four Ways Families Can Cope With Economic Stress

Job loss, car trouble, a leaking roof, credit card bills! What else can happen?! What do you do when the month has more financial demands than the bank account can handle?  These are very real life-events for so many right now; all hope is not lost, even though it can feel very overwhelming at times.

Sometimes when life goes into “crisis-mode”, it can be the perfect time to pull together as a family, really be there for each other and also be creative in how to be supportive, and maybe even have some fun, as you come up with ways to navigate this season in your life.

Consider these four ways to cope with economic stress and then see if you can come up with a few more specific to your family!

 

1 – Have A Financial Plan:

  • How parents respond can have a huge impact on how children will in turn handle tough economic times later in their lives.
  • This is a great time to teach them financial planning, budgets, finding deals, using coupons.  The family can work together to find other sources of income: clean out the house and have a garage sale, sell stuff on eBay, etc.

2 – Connect With Others (including each other in the family):

  • It is a good time to pull together as a family, be creative in dealing with stress, great opportunity to teach your children how to handle these times, for the parents to model a positive way to respond while being real with the challenges.

3 – Use Stress Management Techniques:

  • Journaling is essential to get out of the survival mode. Writing out your fears […]

Five Wrong Reasons People Marry

Are you or someone you know considering marrying their partner? Many couples get married based on feelings or circumstances. Marriage can be a wonderful experience through proactive work. During pre-marital counseling sessions with couples, one of the questions I often ask: what do you like about each other and why are you getting married? Many times the first response is “because we love each other.” Then I ask, what does that mean to you? The couple will usually give me a funny look as if to say, “are you serious?”

CONSIDER THE FIVE WRONG REASONS TO GET MARRIED:

1) YOU THINK YOUR PARTNER IS THE BEST YOU CAN DO

I have heard story after story from individuals that they have had some bad apples along the way, so when they met their husband, they thought he walked on water. When they reflect back, they realize he was “better” than the rest, so they thought he or she was the best that they could do. Therefore, they ignored the red flags when they decided to marry.

2) YOU WANT YOUR PARTNER’S MONEY OR TO INCREASE YOUR INCOME

Many people know this is a bad idea, but how many people would ever even admit to noticing their partner’s car before they even saw their partner? That can be a very extreme example, however, if you find yourself more drawn to your partner’s bank account or how they can relieve your financial stress, it may be a good time to consider what is really important to you.

3) YOU THOUGHT SOME ASPECT OF YOUR PARTNER COULD CHANGE

It is very common to hear one or both […]